Below is a sample from my new book, "A Practical Response to Gender Distress", about understanding and fighting back against the emotional manipulation of ideologically-captured therapists: CHAPTER 8 Pamela’s Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Thank you for acknowledging that kids-or anyone, really-threatening suicide or feigning mental illness to get attention or help need to be met with compassion for the underlying distress. So often I see people with what seems to be black and white thinking on this topic, such as that if (you believe) the motivation is attention then they need "tough love" which to some seems to mean "crank the whip, tell them to suck it up and remind them constantly that they have no REAL problems at all." Marsha Linehan, who you reference, speaks constantly of the importance of validating emotions, and that all emotions (not behaviors) are valid. Some people, at least those commenting online and writing professionally, seem to miss that step when discussing this cohort of kids.
Just because the behavior is poor doesn't mean that there isn't valid emotional distress behind it. And the most effective treatments for that by and large include actually listening to and validation the distress, not telling the person they are completely fine and to be thankful they don't have real problems. There needs to be some nuance there.
And just an aside to say that, while rare, there have almost certainly been anecdotal cases when people, especially kids and very young adults, have been seeking some kind of attention or validation, didn't receive it, and continued to up the ante when a power struggle was set up. These individuals probably didn't really want to die, yet a few have, likely by accident, as they made more and more desperate attempts to have their distress taken seriously.
Thank you for acknowledging that kids-or anyone, really-threatening suicide or feigning mental illness to get attention or help need to be met with compassion for the underlying distress. So often I see people with what seems to be black and white thinking on this topic, such as that if (you believe) the motivation is attention then they need "tough love" which to some seems to mean "crank the whip, tell them to suck it up and remind them constantly that they have no REAL problems at all." Marsha Linehan, who you reference, speaks constantly of the importance of validating emotions, and that all emotions (not behaviors) are valid. Some people, at least those commenting online and writing professionally, seem to miss that step when discussing this cohort of kids.
Just because the behavior is poor doesn't mean that there isn't valid emotional distress behind it. And the most effective treatments for that by and large include actually listening to and validation the distress, not telling the person they are completely fine and to be thankful they don't have real problems. There needs to be some nuance there.
And just an aside to say that, while rare, there have almost certainly been anecdotal cases when people, especially kids and very young adults, have been seeking some kind of attention or validation, didn't receive it, and continued to up the ante when a power struggle was set up. These individuals probably didn't really want to die, yet a few have, likely by accident, as they made more and more desperate attempts to have their distress taken seriously.
This is excellent! And the artwork by detransitioners is a wonderful addition.